


Normal

by SoulOrchard



Series: Life and Times [1]
Category: Batman (Comics), Young Justice, Young Justice (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - High School, Bullying, Child Abuse, Coming Out, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-28
Updated: 2014-09-13
Packaged: 2017-12-16 10:33:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 12,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/861067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SoulOrchard/pseuds/SoulOrchard
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wally's father knows that Dick isn't...normal. He knows that in order to get along in life, be happy; you have to be normal. He tells Wally to stay away from Dick...and to get a girlfriend. Wally's always wanted to please his father. High school AU (warning!) homophobia, emotional/verbal abuse and bullying.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Faggot

Gotham City 

June, 2000

It’s the first day of summer, well—the ending of the first day of summer. Richard Grayson does hand stands on one Wally West’s front lawn, trying to coax the redhead into trying to mimic him.

“Not doing it.” Wally says with an air of finality. His small fingers tread through unruly red hair and winces when he comes into a contact with the knot on his head, gained from the last time he tried to follow Dick’s lead. He just can’t keep up with an acrobat. Spending nearly your whole life in the circus is something Wally didn’t have. So he now knows better.

“C’mon Wally, it’s super easy!” The brunet grins at his friend, shirt falling haphazardly showing off his toned stomach, which was impressive for a nine year old. Wally didn’t even have the Adonis lines …or abs…

“Liar! I almost broke my head last time.” His cheeks puffed as he pouts. It was childish but he doesn’t care. He was with his friend who would never judge him for not acting his age; he preferred not to remind himself he was two years older than Dick. Sometimes he felt jealous of Dick, his friend was “gifted” and skipped two grades.

“Yeah, I know. Totally my fault. You were too heavy for that branch. You’re not as small as me.” He rolled from his hand stand onto his back, letting out an ‘oof’ as he lands. Wally stares at him from his sitting position before joining him on his back, on the grass staring at the orange-y red sky. Night would be upon them soon and he knew that Alfred would be over soon to get Richard. Wally isn’t sure when the next time they were going to see each other would be.

“You should come visit me next time.” Richard says, not taking his eyes off the sky.

“Can I? Would you dad let me?” The redhead turns to look at his friend.

“Would your dad let you?” Blue eyes look into Wally’s green. He has a point. Wally’s dad never did like Richard, or the Wayne family for that matter. Wally doesn’t know why.

A honk interrupts their conversation. They both look to the black sleek car that pulls up to Wally’s suburban home. They both get up and brush the grass from their clothes. Richard quickly wraps his arms around Wally’s middle and lets go before the redhead can react.

“Good-bye Wally. Bye Mrs. West! Bye Mr. West.” Richard waves enthusiastically.

“It was a pleasure to have you!” Wally’s mom calls from the porch. Rudolph grunts in response.

“Bye Richard.” Wally mumbles as Alfred lets the boy into the car. The door closes, and Alfred gets back into the car after waving to the West Family.

“Wally.” The red haired boy flinches at the tone his father uses. “Get up to your room and clean up all that shit you boys left out.”

“Yes sir.” Wally’s shoulders sag as he heads back in. As he walks slowly up the stairs he hears—

“Glad that little fairy’s gone. I don’t understand why you encourage our boy to hang out with that little—”

“Rudy.” She uses that voice that Wally recognizes as her “not now” tone.

“That little charity case is going to…influence our boy if we don’t do something.”

Wally isn’t sure what his dad means; he goes up to his room before he can hear the rest of the conversation.

Gotham City

May, 2001

“Wally, I need to talk to you.” Wally wordlessly heads toward his father, who sat on his favorite reclining chain in the living room. His father had just caught him going down the stairs toward the kitchen.

“Yes, sir?” He says quietly as he sat down on their couch.

“I think it’s about time we had the talk.” Wally’s blood runs cold but his face heats up slightly. “You’re around that age now so I need you to know what’s going on with your body before you go off and do something stupid. Now, I know your body is changing and you’re starting to notice girls more.” He pauses and looks at Wally suspiciously. Wally chanced a look over to his father, flinched when he saw his father’s hard gaze on him, nods to his father, agreeing about noticing girls even though he knows it’s a lie.

“Good. I don’t want you to end up like that little fairy friend of yours.” He grunts.

“Who? Richard?”

“Yeah, Dick.” He says with disgust.

“Whats wrong with—”

“He’s disgusting!” The older man’s face flares red with anger. “He’s a little faggot and he’s going to hell.” Wally’s stomach twists in knots.

“Hell? But why? I don’t understand.” He looks to his father wide eyed and confused.

“You see, Wally. Men were put on this earth to be with women, get them pregnant and have a family. It’s the natural order—normal. Fags are men who want to be with other men. They can’t have children and what they do is unnatural. The bible says they’re going to hell for their disgusting sinning ways.” Wally’s toes curl in his shoes.

“I…I don’t want Dick to go to hell…”

“There’s no savin’ ‘em Wally.” He says flippantly. “He chose to be that way so that’s what he gets.”

His father goes on and on about what’s right, what’s expected of Wally and what his future should look like. It should look like his father’s: a house, a wife and a kid. Wally wants to say something, like ‘Mom’s not here anymore.’ But he didn’t. He keeps quiet and makes a resolution to himself.

He has to get a girlfriend. He has to be normal. He has…he has to stop hanging around Richard…he doesn’t want to be “corrupted”.

Gotham

March, 2003

Dick came out to all of his friends. He, being the adopted son of Bruce Wayne, made headlines. News moves quickly when you're rich and powerful. Bruce took it in stride, holding press conferences, stating he’s going to become a major player in the LGBT community for his son. Wally wishes his father would support him like that.

Wally would bring home straight A’s and Rudy would shrug at him.

He would bring home science trophies; Rudy would frown and make some comment about him being a nerd.

He would bring home a trophy for coming in first for track, his father would mutter ‘It isn’t baseball’ and would continue to ignore him.

Wally would bring home a girl…that one seemed to pique his interest slightly. A girl on his arm.

:::

:::

Rudy wasn’t all that surprised when Richard came out publicly. ‘Little fag,’ he say while reading the paper. “Aren’t you glad you stopped hangin’ around that fairy?”

“Yes sir.”

:::

:::

He had started hanging out with the Jocks of Gotham High. Leaving behind Dick, Megan, Babs and Conner in middle school.

Instead he hangs out with Roy, Artemis, Jade, and Mal. They make fun of Dick, bully him. Wally joined in more times than he’d like to admit. He’s dumped Dick into a dumpster before. He didn’t stick around long enough to see how hurt the brunet had been…or how furious his friends had been. But he laughed it off with Roy.

“Fags’ gotta learn their place right?” Roy would say.

“Right.” Wally would say back.

:::

:::

“Why don’t you just fight back?” Conner asks angrily. He’s been angry a lot lately, probably have something to do with his dad. “Hell, I could hurt them for you!” He nearly snarls.

“It wouldn’t solve anything. Just escalation…and I don’t want to hurt Wally.” Richard brushs the trash and gunk off his clothes. He’s going to stink the rest of the day.

“Oh Dick…you don’t still like him do you?” Babs asks him.

“No! Well…not this him…”

“I don’t understand…” Megan triesto calm Conner down, looking at Dick over the older, broader brunet.

“I still like the way he used to be…not what he’s become.”

“Dick, sweetie, that Wally’s gone. He’s been gone for a long time. I think you should move on.”

Gotham

September-December, 2005

The gap between Dick and Wally grows even larger. Dick joins the drama club with Megan and Babs. Wally goes for the football team with Roy and Mal, leaving the track team.

Dick had started dating Joseph over the summer. Wally recognizes him as Rose’s little bother. He knows Rose is scary good at fencing.

Wally begins dating Artemis after Roy talks him into it—since he’s already dating Jade.

“It’s like we’re brothers!” Roy said, grinning like an idiot.

:::

:::

“Wally…is there something wrong?” Artemis looked at him. She’s kissing down Wally’s neck. Wally’s hands are up her shirt, caressing soft skin, cupping her bust. His mind is elsewhere and she knows it.

“Huh? Oh…it’s…I’m still just…thinking. About that kid.”

“Joseph?” It had only been three months since Dick and Joseph started dating but then…

“Yeah…I mean I know I didn’t really…know him but…what happened to him.”

“Yeah…” She pulls away from Wally; the redhead removes his hand from her shirt. “I know me and my dad don’t get along but…I would never even imagine him trying to kill me…”

Wally sighs and leans back into Artemis’ bed. They sit in silence until Wally has to leave.

:::

:::

He’s still crying. He doesn’t think he can stop. Not anytime soon. It’s been a week and he hasn’t stopped. His boyfriend is dead and it’s his fault. He’s been told over a hundred times that he couldn’t have known Joseph’s dad was a homophobe. That he couldn’t have known that when he and Joey finally decided to get to second base his father would come home from a business trip.

Mr. Wilson was furious. Joey asked Dick to leave. He didn’t want to, he wanted to stay…but he did what he was asked. He left. Joseph died. Mr. Wilson went to jail.

No one messed with him in school…for a while anyway.

Gotham

September-December, 2006

It had been a year since Dick lost his boyfriend and he was…smiling. It made Wally angry. He couldn’t for the life of him figure out why it angered him so much. To see Dick happy with his friends. Maybe it was because his friendships weren’t steady at the moment. Roy was spending all his time with Jade—avoiding him for some unknown reason, Mal is with Karen all the time now. He and Artemis broke up. 

‘You just don’t seem to be into this.’ She said

She’s right, he wasn’t. They said they would remain friends but…she was angry and hurt…kept her distance. So Wally finds himself alone during lunch one day late in the semester. 

He’s surrounded by people, people from the team, track and football but they’re faceless to him.

He concentrates on Dick and the rest who are off to the side, away from everyone—under a tree practicing lines for the play coming up. It looks like Megan messed up a line, Dick laughs. Wally’s frown deepens. He can’t understand why.

The bell rings, signaling lunch is over.

Wally looks down at his tray of untouched food and sighs. He throws it away and heads toward his next class. He sees Dick heading toward him, his class the opposite direction of Wally’s. Dick isn’t even looking at him. He focused on the script in his hand. The redhead sees that they are on a collision course…but he lets it happen.

“Oof—” Richard slammed into Wally’s chest. Wally himself doesn’t budge, so Dick falls on his ass.

“Watch where you’re going fag.” Wally sneers and steps over the brunet.

“Fuck you, closet case.” He hears from behind him. Wally freezes. He turns around and sees Dick getting up from the floor, script strewn across the ground and a defiant look in his blue eyes.

“What did you just call me?” Wally grinds out, talking between his teeth.

“I called you a closet case.” Richard said plainly, like it’s obvious.

“Who the fuck do you think you’re talking to, you disgusting little faggot!?” Wally hears his dad’s words coming from his mouth.

“I’m talking to the guy that’s been staring at me for the past year. I’m talking to the guy that thinks no one notices the way you way look at Roy’s ass in the locker room. I’m talking to the guy who gets a hard on when he gets pinned down during practice!” Dick shouted loud enough for everyone to hear. A crowd is gathering.

Dick doesn’t know these things because he was there personally to see them happen, he’s been told these things by Conner, Babs, and Rose. Conner is the one who figured out that Wally gets hard during practice, when he’s tackled to the ground. It was Babs that pointed out the Wally’s been staring at him. He knows about the locker room incident because of Rose: Rose talks to Jade, who finds out these things from Roy.

Wally grabs him by the front of his shirt and lifts him so his feet are barely touching the ground. Dick still looks defiant.

“Listen hear you little cock sucking—” He is cut off by a pair of, admittedly, soft lips. He freezes. Dick is kissing him. In front of everyone. Something…something cold and dark snaps in Wally. He can hear it snap, like a dam has been busted. Everything becomes hazy.

When he comes out of his stupor, he’s being restrained by teachers. There’s blood on him, on his shorts and his clothes and Dick…Dick isn’t moving. He’s on the ground, bloodied and bruised. School faculty are keeping the students at bay, giving him room.

:::

:::

Dick is hospitalized for a few months. A concussion, broken ribs, broken collarbone and his jaw needed to be wired shut. Wally has to learn this from the news.

He’s kicked out of school. He’s painted as a bully…a monster by the media.

He almost killed Dick…he almost…

Rudy and Wally move away from Gotham to a more “wholesome” part of America, as his father puts it. Keystone; where Rudy grew up.

Wally has to wait to join the school…so now he doesn't get to graduate with his class. He doesn't care though. He still sees Dicks motionless body on the ground…He remembers Artemis’ pale face in the crowd—shock evident. Jade covers her mouth in horror and Roy hold her. Babs is screaming, tears in her eyes. They aren't sad…they’re furious—at him. He deserves her hate. He hates himself. He should be in jail.

Bruce Wayne doesn't press charges. He can’t fathom why…


	2. Accepted

Key Stone

January-June 2007

Wally lets out a shaky nervous breath as he entered the school; his new school. Well, it’s going to be his new school very soon, at the beginning of September to be exact. As he wandered the halls in search of the main office he takes note that much the school looks like it’s one of those schools from cheesy afterschool teen dramas. He sighes internally as he makes a left down a long corridor. The sound of heels hitting pavement in a steady pace brakes him from his thoughts.

His eyes snap up and are greeted with the sight of a blond bombshell walking in his direction. She’s tall, pretty and dressed in leather. Too old to be a student and far too inappropriately dressed to be a teacher. Must be a mom, he thinks.

“Excuse me.” He said, voice echoes slightly from the emptyness of the hallway.

“Can I help you?” She smiles kindly at him. He rubs the back of his neck with his hand.

“I’m kind of lost. Do you know where the main office is?”

“Hm…” She touches her finger to her lip and studies him. “Red hair, freckles, and registering? Transfer from Gotham? You wouldn’t be Wally West would you?” He feels his stomach twist.

“Um…yeah.” He says quietly.

“Nice to meet you Wally. My name is Dinah, but you’ll be calling me Ms. Lance very soon.”

“You’re a teacher?”

“No, I’m the school counselor. To answer your first question; the main office is down this hallway and make a left. It’s the first door on your left. Can’t miss it.”

“Thanks.” He says quickly, trying to walk away before she gets into his past.

“And Wally?” Her voice catches him and he looks back.

“If you need to talk, need to vent. My door is always open.” He nods and takes his leave.

 

:::

:::

 

He isn’t sure why but he did find himself in Ms. Lance’s office the next week. He sits in a rather plush chair, she, still dressed inappropriately for a faculty member in Wally’s opinion, is seated behind a large wooden desk. Looking around the fairly large office he sees books crammed into a dark wooden bookcase. All along the walls were pictures of what Wally guessed were family and maybe other faculty as well as her degrees in psychology.

“I’m glad you came, Wally. To tell you the truth, when you did start school I was going to make you come to these… sessions anyway. But it’s good that were doing this now.”

“You think I need therapy?” Wally thinks he does.

“I think most of the population could stand a few sessions a month.” She smiles and rests her hands on the desk. “How about you tell me about yourself Wally?”

“Or we could just cut to the chase. You want me to talk about what happened in Gotham right? Me almost killing Dick.”

“Dick?” Her blond eyebrow quirks.

“Yeah, Richard Grayson.”

“I know who you were talking about. I just didn’t expect you to say his name with such… familiarity.” He looks away from her, she takes note. “Alright then Wally, how about we start with this; how do you feel about homosexuality?” He’s quiet for a minute before he answeres.

“My dad says it’s disgusting. It’s a sin and they’re going to be punished.”

“Wally, I asked what you thought of it.”

“Same thing I guess.” He mutters, his eyes focus on his lap.

“You guess?” She took note of his insecurity and uncertainty.

“You know… when I attacked him, Richard—I mean. I don’t even remember most of it. He kissed me and I kinda snapped. I didn’t…I didn’t mean to do it.”

“He kissed you?”

“Yeah…he called me a closet case and he kissed me. Then I beat him half to death.” He rubs his knuckles, still remembering how they looked with blood splattered on them.

“Why do you think you did that? Why do you think you had that reaction?”

“Fear? I guess…Everyone was looking and—and…”

“You were scared of what other people would say?”

“I…I don’t want people to think I’m gay!” He snaps. She pauses in her scribbling for a moment.

“Are you?”

“Gay?! No! I’m not gay!” His breathing becomes heavier, he averts his eyes from hers.

“Calm down Wally. It was a simple question.”

“Yeah…right. I know. I’m sorry.” Wally slowly rests his face in his hands. “I used to know him. I mean…we were best friends.”

“You and Richard?”

“Yeah… thick as thieves. We used to inseparable.”

“What happened?”

“My dad told me I needed to stop hanging out with him or else he would make me gay too…so I stopped.”

“Because your father told you to?”

“Yeah…” She takes down a few more notes. “You know what the worst part is? I’ve always tried to get my father’s attention. To get him to be proud of me. I got straight A’s, won science fairs and joined sports teams and he never batted an eye. But when he had to pick me up that day. He heard what I did to Dick… he looked so… proud of me. It made me sick.”

 

:::

:::

 

“Talk to me about your relationship with Artemis.” Wally finds himself in the plush chair the same time a week later. They were already twenty minutes into their discussion when Ms. Lance askes him about his old flame.

“Roy was dating her sister and he always dropped hints that Artemis was single, or Jade thought we would be cute together. I knew what he was hinting at but I wasn’t interested. Then during a pool party at Roy’s place…she kissed me and I guess we started going out.” The redhead shrugs.

“She kissed you? You didn’t initiate?”

“No…”

“If you weren’t interested why did you go along with it?” Wally shrugs again. He had never talked to anyone about his failed relationship with Artemis before. Not even to Roy.

“I hadn’t had a girlfriend in a while and Roy was on my back about it. Plus I thought it would ease the loneliness.”

“Did it?” He shakes his head.

“You mentioned she said that you weren’t into it. What do you think she meant by that?”

“Well…Whenever she would kiss me I would hesitate or stop short…and when she tried to move things further….like sex and stuff I couldn’t…I…” He mumbles, eyes downcast and focused on his twitching fingers.

“Couldn’t preform?” She raises a delicate eyebrow. He flushes.

“There’s no shame in—”

“Of course there is!” He cut her off. “I…I’m still a virgin. Because I couldn’t get it up with a pretty girl. There’s something wrong with me…”

 

:::

:::

 

“I heard about your father Wally. How are you holding up?”

“Fine… I guess. I mean… I knew it would happen eventually.”

“You knew your father would get drunk and run someone down with his car?”

“No… not that exact thing. He always drinks; from sun up to sundown. The more he drinks the angrier and more violent he gets. It was just a matter of time before he hurt someone.” Wally wears an emotionless face, eyes focusing nowhere in particular.

“How long will he be in jail?”

“Nine years. Driving under the influence and vehicular assault. I’m kind of surprised it wasn’t longer.”

“Where are you living now?”

“My Aunt Iris and Uncle Barry, they’re… nice. A little goofy though.”

“Perhaps that’s what you need. To get away from the environment your father created. Now I have another question for you, Wally. Did your father ever hit you?” Green eyes snap forward to look at the woman in front of him. He seems to mull it over in his head before answering.

“A few times… it wasn’t a constant thing. Like when I dropped a plate or when he was in a really bad mood. It didn’t start till after my mom left. The drinking I mean.”

“Wally… when we first met I noticed… a scar, on your arm. Your wrist, actually. Could you—”

“I don’t want to talk about it.”

 

:::

:::

 

The next few months are uneventful. Wally goesto his sessions, which Iris and Barry encouraged unlike his father. He loves living with them. Its happy and cheery… something Wally hasn't felt in a long time. It scares him a little.

Wally finds himself on his laptop at his desk, located in his room, staring at the screen. Facebook has been pulled up and it shows countless messages from Roy, who has been trying to make contact with Wally. Some from Artemis, a few nasty ones from Barbara that he did read. He didn’t reply though and he even contemplates deleting his page every now and then… maybe make a new one. This… all of this is his old life. A life he hates. He doesn’t want to be reminded anymore.

He’d make new friends when school started up in the fall… there would be time.

 

:::

:::

 

It’s the tail end of summer when Wally finds himself on Facebook again. He’s still working up the courage to delete the thing. He chews his lip when he moused over the search bar. He quickly types in a name before he could change his mind.

Richard Grayson

Of course he’s the top result. The redhead is about to click the profile when he noticed the picture. It was Dick….with someone’s arms wrapped around him. He can feel his stomach churning. Tentatively he clicks and is led to the profile where he enlarges the picture. There it was… Dick had a new boyfriend. They look… his arm’s round Dick’s waist, lips pressing against Dicks cheek and Dick trying to shy away and….they look so Happy. He looks Happy.

He slams his laptop shut.

 

:::

:::

 

Key Stone

September-March 2007-2008

It was the first day at his new school and already he’shaving a terrible horrible time. As soon he gets to homeroom he bumps into a boy. A pretty boy if Wally’s to be honest with himself. Strawberry blond wavy hair that’s pulled back into a loose ponytail with thick framed glasses sitting low on the bridge of his nose. The boy, who he finds out later, was named Hartley—who names their kid Hartley? As it turns out Wally has three classes with the kid…who kept staring at him.

Wally could feel it, eyes boring into his skull. It was putting the redhead on edge, fidgety and apprehensive. During lunch, however, Hartley decides to actually say something to Wally, unfortunately it was-

“You’re Wally West, right? That guy who almost killed some kid in Gotham and got away with it?” The blond didn’t look amused at all when he said it. Wally was actually glad he’s sitting on the outskirts of the quad by himself. No one else heard Hartley’s declaration.

“Uh…”

“Listen here, you homophobe. If you even touch one of the gay kids here you-” He jabs a finger into Wally’s chest. “-will be dealing with me and the entire LGBT club here.” Wally blinks, and blinks again. Hartley leaves without another word.

 

:::

:::

 

For a small town in Kansas, it has a pretty strong, close knit LGBT community. They were close knit too. It didn’t matter if anyone had been there when Hartley and Wally had officially met, word had gotten around the school and Wally was an outcast. Looked at as some kind of psychopath and future serial killer or something.

Wally thinks he deserves it, Ms. Lance believes otherwise.

“Wally It isn’t fair to you. Getting demonized is detrimental to what we’ve been working on.” The therapy sessions continued even after Wally joined Keystone high. Wally sits silently as Ms. Lance stares at him worriedly, fingers laced on her desk. “I know you feel guilty about what you did and I know you think you deserve all of this for what you did to Dick but I’m telling you it wasn’t your fault. Your father created a terrible environment for you to grow in and influenced your judgment. You feeling guilty about it—”

“I know that you’re getting at but…There’s nothing I can do except grin and bear it.”

“Not exactly…I’ve had a talk with your science teacher, Mr. Scott.” Wally’s face pales a bit. He knows Mr. Alan Scott doesn’t like him, hates him even, since he has a gay son. “And he thinks it would be a good idea is you and Hartley were partnered up for your upcoming science project.”

Why did life keep getting worst?

 

:::

:::

 

Now Wally really did feel like he was in a cliché 90’s afterschool mellodrama. Science project with the person who hates your guts in hopes you get over your differences? Not likely. They had decided, which actually meant Hartley demanded, that they meet in the Library for their science project meet up since “I don’t want to be alone with you in my house. No telling what would happen.” Wally believes he has read into that a bit much.

So here they are, opposite sides of a long table; Wally quietly reading his text book and taking notes. He knows that Hartley is peering up at him from his own notes at the redhead. He put down his pencil and looked at his science partner who had just been caught staring.

“What?” The redhead askes evenly.

“Just thinking it’s a real shame you're straight. You’d actually be really cute if you weren’t a gay bashing homophobe.” Hartley says flippantly. He eyes Wally but is surprised when Wally simply goes back to taking notes. Wally knows Hartley is just trying to get a rise out of him. It won’t work. He tells himself that as he fights back the blush threatening to spread across his cheeks.

 

:::

:::

 

The second time they met, it’s at Wally’s house, well his aunt and uncles house. He still doesn’t refer to it as home. When Hartley enters the redhead’s room he looks…surprised. There are science awards along with a few sports trophies. Comic books are stacked on his desk while his book case, while not as packed as Ms. Lance, was still filled with novels and textbooks. The blond teen walks over to the bookcase and ran his finger along the spines.

“You’ve read all these?” He sounds incredulous as he pulls out one book in particular.

“Most of them. I’m still reading that one.” Wally responds in an almost mumble. He referred to the book Hartley had in his hand. “The Heart of Darkness”.

“My favorite book.” The other teen mentions offhandedly. “I didn’t know you were a fan of literature….I half expected your room to be filled with death metal posters…or a bunch of crucifixes.”

“I’m not a Satanist….or a religious nut.”

“So then why did you—”

“We should start on our project.”

 

:::

:::

 

The next few meetings go the same way. Either at the library or at Uncle Barry’s house. It’s no surprise Iris adores Hartley. Barry is happy Wally has a friend. But then they were in private Hartley kpps digging. Asking about his old life, about Dick, about the incident. Wally does his best to either ignore the questions of change the subject but today Hartley would have none of it.

“Why?”

“Why what?” Wally snapped.

“You’re smart, you’re talented and from what your aunt told me, you had a lot going for you back at Gotham. Why did you…”

“It’s none of your business.” Wally says through gritted teeth. He’s getting tired of the questions. “Look, it’s late. I think you should leave.” He gets up from the floor where they had been studying but he stops when he feels delicate long fingers wrap around his wrist. He was pretty strong for a band geek.

“No way, not until you…” He stops and so does Wally. Hartley is staring it his wrist, at the scar that hasn’t quit faded. The redhead feels the color drain from his face. “Is that—?”

“Leave, now!” He pulls his wrist away from the other boys grip. Wally can’t believe he’s been so careless.

“No. Wally, I want answers.”

“I don’t owe you anything Hartley, get out!” He’s starting to panic.

“I could help!”

“Help!? Why the fuck would you want to help me? Some queer bashing homophobe who isn’t worth the time of day?” Wally slings hurtful words Hartley had thrown at him. He backs away, back colliding with the wall behind him. “Why does it matter if I tried to kill myself?” His voice begins dying down as tears begin to fall. “Wouldn’t everyone be better off?” He feels himself sliding down the wall. Pent up feelings: anger, frustration and anguish pouring out of him. “Please…just go.”

Hartley did leave. They both decide that it would be better if they worked on their project separately.

 

:::

:::

 

“It’s good that you got that off your chest Wally.” Ms. Lance stares at the nonresponsive redhead. “Trust me Wally, it’s good to confide in someone…Please tell me Wally…why did you try and kill yourself?”

It’s silent in the room for a while before Wally responded.

“I just…” He took a deep calming breath. “I just wanted it to end. I think it’s the reason why my dad wanted to move from Gotham. He found me in the bathroom like that. Covered in blood. I was kind of surprised I woke up in the hospital.”

“Surprised? Why?”

“I figured he’d let me die.” There’s another tense silence. “I’ve never been anything but a burden or an embarrassment to him. I’d thought he’d just…stand by. I was put on suicide watch and they wanted to have me do therapy there but my dad was…adamant against it. We moved here soon after that.”

 

:::

Its winter break and Wally sits alone in his room. Christmas is tomorrow—Wally looks at the clock on his nightstand that reads twelve o’ clock am—Christmas was today and Wally isn’t in the mood for opening the presents his aunt and uncle had gotten him, even though he asked them not to; he didn’t deserve them.

He’s surprised when his phone vibrates in his pocket. Pulling it out and unlocking the screen he sees he had a text message from Hartley. ‘Merry Christmas’ it reads.

The redhead frowns and doesn’t respond.

:::

 

Her name is Linda and Wally recognizes that she’s pretty, that she’s beautiful. She works for the schools newspaper and has been trying to get an interview with him since the first day of school but Wally always brushes her off. She never gave up though.

After the incident with Hartley that happened the previous semester, Wally started to feel lonely. He couldn’t believe he misses the bossy blond but he was the only person that Wally talked to. The redhead approaches her, Linda, one day after school but instead of giving her the interview he asks her out. She accepts.

:::

:::

The rest of the year goes by in a blur. Wally has been moved into advanced placement classes after his teachers notice he isn’t being challenged. Ms. Lance said that he’s fast tracking himself into a good university, which was good.

It seemed that his life was getting back on track to outsiders. He has a pretty girlfriend, a 5.0 GPA and loving guardians…but Linda knows better. Wally isn’t happy any more than when he first arrived. He was using his AP classes as a distraction…he was using her as a distraction when he was out of homework.

She knows that the kisses are not full of passion but of disconnect. His hugs are lackluster.

His excuses as to why they can’t spend time together are too many and half assed. Eventually, she stops.

:::

:::

Wally thinks it’s a sign. After he’d taken his SAT’s he had sent his results to five schools. A score of two thousand was great, good enough to get into most school but the first that sends a reply is Gotham University.

A full ride scholarship back to his home…back to…

Barry and Iris support his decision.

:::

:::

It’s after graduation that Linda tells Wally.

“You’re breaking up with me?” Wally asks, crushed; color fading from his face.

“Wally…you’re a great guy, despite what everyone else thinks. You’re nice and sweet but…you’re not into this. You aren’t into me. I don’t like being used as a distraction Wally…and that’s what I’ve been to you.”

Wally hangs his head and doesn’t dare to say she’s wrong. She kisses him on the cheek and leaves him with his thoughts.

Later that night as Wally lay in his bed staring at the ceiling, thinking of what he’d done wrong with Linda, he hears a knock at the door.

“Come in.” He calls out absent mindedly. He expects to see Iris walk in and try and coax him into eating again but instead its,

“Hartley?” He asks confused. He hadn’t spoken to the blond boy in a few months.

“Your aunt let me in.” He walks in, closing the door behind him. “I heard what happened with Linda.”

“Yeah, and?” Wally was getting agitated. The blond shrugs.

“Wanted to say I’m sorry? About her, how I treated you when you first got here and…about your wrist.”

“Why are you apologizing?” The redhead’s brow knits together.

“Because I know why now.” Well that was cryptic. “The whole thing. The incident at Gotham, Linda. I did some research…you and that kid, Richard Grayson. He kissed you and you lost it.”

“So what?” He feelsl his blood being pumped quicker.

“He called you out didn’t he?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about…” He’s starting to panic.

“You’re gay.” Hartley takes a step closer. Into the room, closer to Wally. 

“I’m not gay!” He nearly shouts. He’s up from his bed now, his full height towering over Hartley who didn’t seemed fazed.

“It makes sense. Linda told me you weren’t into her at all; she caught you staring at guys most of the time.”

“Get out!”

“It’s okay Wally…” Hartley puts a hand on his shoulder, the redhead flinches away.

“Don’t fucking touch me!” He backs away.

“Wally, it’s okay.” The back of Wally’s knees hit the bed, causing him to topple over onto his bed. Taking advantage Hartley crawled onto the bed, on top of Wally.

“W-what are you…?” Lips descended on to his. Breathing quickened, heart pounding and fingers trembling Wally found himself kissing back. Fingers tangling themselves in wavy strawberry blond hair. His other hand roaming lower. Wally doesn’t know why…why he was reacting. Why he wanted more…no—he knew and it scares him. So much.

Hartley kissed down his jaw, to his neck, his collar bone. “Stop, Hartley. Please stop.” He could feel tears stinging his eyes. His body was trembling all over, and he weakly pushed at the blonds shoulders. “Please….I just want to be normal.”

“Wally?”

The door to his room opened, Iris walked in. Tears were flowing freely from his eyes when he spotted her. Hartley removes himself from Wally; stepping back as the redhead kept trembling and crying, muttering under his breath.

“Wally?!” Iris rushes to his side. “Wally what’s wrong? Are you okay?” Hartley backes away.

“I just want to be normal. I don’t want to go to hell. Why can’t I be normal?” She holds the trembling boy.

“Oh Wally, why would you go to hell? Where is this coming from!? Wally, please talk to me!” Hartley slips out of the room, rushing out of the house.

“Aunt Iris…I think…” He tries to calm himself. He tries to stop crying, but the more he tries the worst it got. “I think I’m gay. Please don’t tell my dad, please don’t tell my dad, please don’t…”

 

:::

:::

Keystone

June 2008

“It’s okay to be gay Wally.” Ms. Lance—err, Dinah tells him. She told him to call her Dinah now that he was no longer a student. They had been having daily sessions since his breakdown.

It’s helping.

“Wally your father is the one that instilled those negative emotions to something that’s completely fine. I need you to accept that. The faster you accept that, the faster you can accept yourself.”

It was helping.

“I know forcing himself on you was wrong but Hartley did do some good too. He got you to discover something very important about yourself you’ve been ignoring. I think it’s time you started exploring this side of you that has been buried for who knows how long.”

This was…it’s really helping.

“I’m supportive of you moving back to Gotham for school, their science program is top notch. I also want you to try and reconnect with the people you left behind. This will be good for you. It’s time to stop running from your problems.”

He feels so light. He couldn’t say that he was happy but he felt…better. This was helping. He is gay…

He never did talk to Hartley again, he did however track Linda down and apologized to her, confess what had happened between him and Hartley…what he finally admitted to himself. She understood.

:::

:::

Central City

2008 August

Wally stood there, bags packed and ready to board. He lets out a shaky breath as his flight time arrived. He’s going back to Gotham. He was leaving his aunt and his uncle…he was leaving his home with them. It’s normal that he was apprehensive.

“You’ll come visit during holiday’s right?”

“Of course Aunt I…”

“Call us if you need anything Wally.

“I know Barry…thanks….both of you. For everything.”

“We love you Wally, and nothing will ever change that.”


	3. Bitter

Gotham

2008 October

Wally isn’t sure why he’s come here. He isn’t sure why he does a lot of things lately. It’s his old house, his old stomping grounds, where some of his most cherished memories were made…where some of the most horrible days of his life happened. 

Where Wally had all of his birthday parties.

Where his parents fought.

Where he would spend countless hours with Dick.

Where his dad drank himself into stupors.

Where Wally’s father hit him.

A bitter autumn wind scatters the changing leaves, flying all around him, collecting in the gutters of his old home, piling up on the browning lawn. His father would always make sure that their lawn was trim and green, that leaves would never collect like this. The new owners aren’t nearly as attentive.

He stares hard at the structure as if it could answer why he was here. What was he doing here?

 

Wally pulls his worn, brown leather jacket closer to himself and flips up the hood of his red undershirt as the wind picks up even more. He turns to leave his once home and its new occupants to themselves to get back to his dorm.

“Wally?” A familiar, warm voice cuts through the cold wind. It’s a voice that he recognizes. He doesn’t think he can ever forget that slight rasp and pitch. It conjures images of blond hair and full lips. Green eyes and dark skin; darker than his in any case. “Wally? That is you, isn’t it?”

He’s rooted to the spot and can’t move. Guilt acting like shackles around his ankles. It weighs him to the ground so he cant run from this. In truth he doesn’t want to, but it seemed to remove the temptation. “Hey Arty.” It slips from his mouth and is carried off by the wild wind whipping up leaves and rustling bushes and words all the same.

She stands there for a moment, to regard him. Maybe to make sure she isnt going crazy. She then takes a step forward, then closes the gap between them instantly afterward and reels back her arm, hand balling into a fist before letting it crash into his left shoulder. It hurt, but he didn’t complain.

“What the hell Wally?!” She shouts at him. “You just…after all that you just…disappeared! No word, at all! I heard you tried to kill yourself and then you were just…gone!”

He let her get it all out, she deserves it. He deserves it. Two years without a ‘hello’ or an ‘I’m sorry’.

He takes a deep breath, “Yeah, well. That happened, and I’m sorry. For everything. There was…there was a lot going on with me in those last weeks and I was…I was breaking on the inside.” She stands there looked at him as he wore that pathetic look that made her feel…

“Look, let’s get out of the cold.”

::

::

Wally finds, himself minutes later, at an old coffee shop that must have been built after he left because he doesn’t remember it. They’re silent, sitting across from each other. They have already gone through the ‘what have you been up to’s’, ‘how have you been’s’, and ‘what’s new’s’. Wally takes a sip of his scalding hot coffee, his nose scrunches up in pain before setting the cup down. “I was in therapy while I was down there…” He breaks the silence. “It…really helped me…come to, uh, terms. With myself, with a lot of things.” He tries not to talk with his hands, let them keep warm on his cup.

“What…was going on with you? Can you even tell me what happened during therapy?” Wally nods. Ms. Lance wasn’t able to tell due to doctor patient stuff but Wally could divulge whatever he feels comfortable with.

“The last few weeks I was in Gotham, were really bad. I felt alone all the time. My dad’s drinking got worse; my grades were slipping because of stress. I was a mess.”

“Wally, why didn’t you say anything? To me or Roy?”

“We had just broken up Arty. It didn’t seem like you were ready to be friends again…not just yet. Roy was going through stuff with Jade…I didn’t want to dump my problems on him. And then when Dick kissed me it all just…shattered I guess.” She takes a sip of her tea while Wally let his coffee cool so he could chug it.

They slip back into a silence. The background noise of the little shop became much more apparent. The scream of the cappuccino machine, idle chatter from the other patrons of the shop and the jingling of the bell above the door signaling customers coming in from or out into the cold. There are questions she wants to ask, Wally sees it written all over her face; confusion, worry, relief all flashing in her eyes.

“While I was down there, I came to terms with myself.” Wally breaks the silence between them again. He stares into the tan colored coffee swirling around in his cup, the steam almost gone from it. “I’m gay.” He pauses slightly to let the words drift over to Artemis. He looks up and expects to see a face of shock or mild surprise, at least. Instead a smirk greets him, a smirk that only Artemis could muster.

“Wally, I know you’re gay.” She takes another sip of her quickly cooling tea.

“Huh…”

“Well, I mean. Not the whole time. While we were dating. I mean I basically threw myself at you…a lot. I would always be the one initiating the kiss and when I did you got all tense and it was like you couldn’t wait for it to end. Then when it came to sex…I tossing so many hints at you and you never acted on anything.” The tips of Wally’s ears are a scarlet red. “After we broke up I started putting pieces together. At first I was just really angry about it…”

“I’m sorry. You’ve met my dad right? I grew up in a house where he always made fun of gay people and told me that they’re going to hell just for being who they are. I was just so pent up and scared and angry and it just kind of erupted on Dick that day.” His pale fingers splay onto the cup of now lukewarm coffee.

“So…” Artemis attempts to steer the conversation in another direction. She knows that she was going to have to talk to Wally about Dick before they went their separate ways. “Where are you staying now?” She needs to ease him into it though.

“A dorm on campus. I was thinking about finding an apartment but my scholarship also covers my dorm fees so why not? Plus I got a single, no room mate.” He smiles a little.

“Wow, lucky you. I had to live at home with dad my first year, now I’m living with some roommates. That’s why I ran into you, I was on my way back home.”

“So, your living in my old neighborhood? Awkward.”

“Not really. I mean, almost no one from our high school year lives around here anymore and my roommates are kind of awesome. I know some of them would want to meet you.”

“Who are you living with?” Wally askes, his interest piqued.

“Barbara, for one. She still hates you, by the way.”

“Noted. How is that anyway? I never remember the two of you getting along that well.”

“We hashed it out a while ago. We’re friends now.” Artemis shrugs. “She’s going into Administration of Justice just like her old man. Then there Roy.”

“You’re living with Roy?” Wally sits up in his seat. He hasn’t seen Roy in forever. He misses his friend and his stupid face. Even all the talk of ‘Us gingers need to stick together!’, even though Roy’s red hair had darkened into a nice red-brown while Wally’s hasn’t.

“Yeah, he can get annoying sometimes but he’s surprisingly always on time with rent so what can you do. He’s going into engineering.”

“Wow…I would never have pegged him for that.”

“Then there is Harper Rowe, one of Roy’s friends from his engineering courses. She’s pretty cool. I think you two would get along. Though her little brother is always over…” She trailes off.

“Is he annoying?”

“Well…no. More like obviously crushing on Roy. It was cute at first…” Wally chuckles. “And then there’s Miguel. I met him by chance. We needed one more tenant and he fit in fine.”

“Sounds like an interesting house to live in.”

“It can be fun…sometimes.”

“What are you majoring in Arty? I never asked.”

“Linguistics.” She shrugs.

“You were always good at Spanish.” Wally muses.

“And French, and Vietnamese…”

“Okay, Okay. I get it. Show off.” They both chuckle.

“What about you?”

“I’m not exactly sure yet, something to do with science. Biology probably.”

“Dick’s going into Administration of Justice too, you know. He always wanted to be a cop…” Wally averts his eyes. Artemis has to press the issue though. “Have you…have you talked to Dick? At all?”

“No.” He says simply.

“Wally…”

“No, Arty. I don’t…I put him in the hospital. I damaged him. There’s nothing I can say to make that right. Nothing I can say to make him forgive me and I’m not even sure I should to be forgiven.”

“You want him to be angry at you for the rest of both your lives? Wally that’s silly. The reason you’re not in jail is because of Dick. He urged his dad not to take you to court.”

“Is that what happened? I never knew…”

“Yeah…he still. He still asks about you. Asks if I’ve heard from you.”

“Arty, no. I don’t think…”

“You know what West…I think I need to take you dancing.” Wally looks at her strangely.

“Dancing?” He says incredulously.

“Yes. There’s a really awesome gay club that opened up near the campus. It’s called Avalon and tonight you and I are going dancing.”

“Uh, Arty. I’m not twenty one yet.”

“It’s an eighteen and up club, you can’t buy alcohol but you can go and dance. You are going, you’re going to dress in your nicest clothes that show off your ass, and you’re going dancing with me.” Wally knew that tone. There wasn’t any getting out of this. And if he tried to there would be hell to pay.

“Fine…” He grumbles.

::

He’s unsure of what to do. Wally paces around his small dorm room. Clothes are strewn around the room, all over the floor. He isnt sure what he should wear. He only owns so many pairs of pants...and how is he supposed to know which ones show off his ass? He regrets turning Artemis’ offer to help him pick out clothes. 

A sigh leaves his mouth as he collapses onto his bed, sending clothes scattering to the floor. Long fingers tread through unruly red hair as Wally takes a minute to think. Think about what he’s signed up for.

Dancing at a gay club. His first time ever even going to a club. Would he be expected to hook up? His face flushes and he thinks about calling Artemis and tell her its off. 

“C’mon West…” He mumbles to himself in his empty with only his clothes to hear him. “You’ve been running away from this kind of stuff your whole life.” How could he ever expect to be the well=adjusted you man Dinah thinks he is if he keeps shutting this part of him out? Wally sits up and looks around the room at his discarded clothes.

He can do this. And maybe...maybe he could come out of this with a boyfriend? His first boyfriend. The redhead collapses back onto the bed and lets out a strangled groan.

::

Strobe lights illuminate the dance floor, a plethora of grinding writhing bodies are before Wally, reminding him of his complete inexperience with this entire scene. He hasn’t even willingly kissed a guy before and now he’s at a gay club. Artemis had told him to go in without her and would meet up with him at the bar. So here he sat at the bar nursing a coke in his red skinny jeans and yellow button up. His chest exposed because Artemis told him no undershirt. Wally’s never felt so vulnerable…and that isn’t the worst part.

“Hey cutie.” An older looking guy, at least twenty five stops in front of him. “Interested in dancing?” This was the third guy who’s tried to get him onto the dance floor.

“N-no thanks. I’m waiting on a friend.” He half shouts over the heavy base filling the building.

“Then how about I buy you a drink?” The man persists.

“He isn’t interested.” A new voice cuts in, loudly over the music. Someone who Wally recognized. Tall, strong jaw and red-brown hair. “Beat it.” It comes out almost like a growl that sends the older man scurrying away.

“Roy?”

“Hey Wally.” The taller man grins.

“What are you doing here?” Here, at a gay club.

“Artemis. She told me you were going to be here so I tagged along.”

“Where is Artemis?”

“On the dance floor. C’mon!” He hauled the shorter red head off the stool and into the throngs of dancing men, and very few women. They were almost to the center when he felt Roy’s hand let go of his wrist. He tried to keep up but the older red head disappeared into the crowd leaving Wally.

“Shit.” Wally mutters. He cant hear himself speak on the dance floor. “Roy!?”

“Wally!?” The red head turned toward where he heard his muffled name. A boy, shorter than him was standing there shirtless and black jeans riding low on his hips. Brilliant blue eyes stare at Wally and a smile crept onto his face slowly and magnificently, straight white teeth almost glowing.

“Dick?” It tumbles from his lips and is washed away by the reverberating base penetrating his chest, making his heart beats feel strained. Dick didn’t need to hear what Wally said though. His hips start to sway to the beat again.

“Dance with me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I’ve been away from FanFic writing for a while. Mostly because life got in the way (work, school, working on my original stuff) and then when all that settled down I kind of fell into a fit of laziness. This chapter was actually supposed to be up sooner but the file didn’t save and I had to rewrite this chapter from scratch and I swear the first time I wrote it, it was better. At least I think so.  
> I will probably come back to this chapter and touch it up before I move onto the next. Let me know what you guys think.


	4. Two Steps Back

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...I guess I have to explain why this took so long and why I haven't gotten to anything else I'm writing. Well life got hectic (usual writer excuse) and when it wasn't being hectic I was extremely lazy. Like pathetically lazy. So now Im going to try and...get out of that lazy funk and write again. I cant promise regular updates...that doesn't mean they cant happen though. 
> 
> As for my other works...I'm not sure about them. My Age reversal I will definitely get back to but the others...not so sure. 
> 
> ANYWAY, comment if you liked it and comment if you didn't! I like constructive feedback whether its positive or negative...as long as its good feedback :]

Gotham 

October 2008

His hips sway to the hypnotic music, pallid skin reflecting all the colors of the strobe lights perfectly. From red, to blue, to green, to yellow and then back to red. Wally’s mind is hazy, not completely comprehending what is happening. He let Artemis drag him here so he could have fun but instead he’s dancing with Dick. A shirtless, dancing Dick who’s smiling at him. It takes Wally a minute to realize he isn't moving, and just staring. 

He gives the whole club a once over looking for Roy or Artemis, but he can't see either of them through the throngs of bodies. He jumps slightly when he feels hands on his hips. His eyes snap back to Dick, who's forcing Wally’s hips to sway to the music with his. 

“Dance!” Dick yells with a laugh, coaxing Wally into dancing. 

“I don't know how!” The redhead’s face is flushed, but starts swaying to the music anyway.

“It’s okay Wally, no one does!” Dick flashes a brilliant smile before letting the taller boy’s hips go and starts dancing. Wally moves his feet clumsily to the bass heavy music that he sometimes confuses with his own heartbeat. 

He watches Dick move fluidly, swaying of front of Wally, teasing look on his face. Wally feels like Dick is putting on a show, turning in place and shaking his rear--showing off a small black tattoo on his right shoulder blade. It’s of some kind of bird. Wally wants to take a closer look but Dick has turned back around. He shifts closer to the redhead until they’re almost touching.

Dick’s hands find their way onto Wally’s shoulders, one snakes its way to the back of his neck. They begin to sway in time with each other and the rest of the club seems to fade away into nothingness. All that mattered to Wally at this very moment was the crystal blue eyes, lithe naked torso and sweaty unruly black hair that is making his heart flutter, his head swim and his pants tighten.

Dick’s perfectly straight white teeth bite down on his bottom as he stares into Wally’s bright green eyes.

The music peters out into something slower that didn't seem to Dick’s liking. He grabs Wally by the hand and pulls him off the dance floor.

::  
::

Wally finds himself outside the club in a back alley. There’s a couple of guys making out further down in the Alley but Dick doesn't seem to mind. Dick seems to notice that’s still the fall season and shivers.

“Where’s your shirt?” Wally asks.

“Um...I think Artemis has it?” He thinks for a minute. “Does she know you're here? What…what are you doing here, Wally? Not that I'm not happy to see you! Because I am…” His cheeks flush pink and he averts his eyes.

“Artemis is the one who told me to come... She didn't say you would be here. What are you doing here?” Wally chooses to ignore the tension in his gut. He’s freaking out on the inside; he really didn't want to see Dick. Not so soon. If ever. 

“I like to come here every now and then... to unwind and relax. All the tests and studying stress me out.” 

Artemis had set him up, this meeting with Dick.

“I wish I could get Garth to come with me but--”

“Garth?”

“Yeah, Garth. He’s, uh, my boyfriend.” The boy fidgets. “He doesn't really like dancing. So I usually come here with Babs or Artemis.” The both fall into silence, and Dick shivers again. Wally takes off his button-up and hands it to Dick.

“You never were good with the cold.” Dick takes the yellow button up. He takes a moment to look at the expanse of Wally’s freckled torso. Even though Wally hadn't been on any kind of sports team he never let his body lose definition. Dick stops staring long enough to put the button up onto his quivering goose flesh. The material is thin but it helps.

“Wally… How come you never... how come you never tried to contact me... any of us.”

“Dick...after what I did... all that I did to you... I don’t even understand how you can stand looking at me.”

“Wally... I forgave you… for what you did.” His eyes widen at the declaration. 

“What? Dick, why would you...ever…?”

“Because the Wally that I know... the one I knew would never do that to me. Not to mention I started it. I egged you on--I kissed you. I knew what your dad was like, how he treated gays. I knew... I knew you were so repressed and I poked the bear essentially.” Wally stands there, confused. Was Dick really trying to carry some of the blame?

“No, Dick. Don’t you even try to say it was your fault. There was a lot I could have done differently, a lot of things I wish I could unsay but you…” He can feel his heart begin to race. “….you didn’t do anything wrong. You called me out, and I deserved it.” He doesn't like where this conversation is heading. He needs to get out of here before he has a minor break down. 

He isn't ready for this conversation. 

“Look, Dick. I have to go.”

“Are...you sure? I mean…”

“No, I have a ton of homework to do...and I told Artemis I wouldn't be out too long anyway.” Dick’s face falls for a moment. 

“Okay.” He mutters. “Call me then?” He looks into Wally’s eyes as he fishes a pen from his pants pocket. He grabs the redhead’s hand and scribbles his number onto his palm. Wally stares at for a moment. 

“Okay, sure…” He doesn’t sound very sure. 

“Promise me?”

“Yeah, I promise.” He leaves. Through the alley, past the couple who have moved on from making out to drunken groping, hands underneath shirts and unzipping zippers. Dick doesn't relinquish his shirt, keeping it as “collateral.” Wally catches a taxi, shirtless but he isn't cold. His body feels warm.

::  
::

It’s a few days later wally finds himself sitting at his desk in the corner of his small dorm. His phone is in his hands, trembling slightly as he types up a message. He’s far too nervous to make the call. His thumbs ghost over the letters but his trembling causes him to misspell almost every word causing the simple three sentence message to take nearly twenty minutes to compose. 

‘Hey Dick...I know I said I’d call but a text is just as good right? I was kind of wondering when Id be able to get my shirt back, it happens to be my favorite. This is Wally by the way.’

He looks at the message he’s managed to get together. He flushes a deep red and deletes it. It shouldn't be nearly this hard. He opts for a single “Hey.” and hits send. 

‘Who’s this?’ is the quick reply. Wally groans. His phone buzzes again, another text from Dick. ‘Im joking Wally. I thought I said to call! Don’t be such a chicken shit!’ 

Wally’s eyes widen. His phone buzzes again, letting him know that there’s an incoming call from Dick. He pauses for a moment, unsure if he should answer.

He presses accept. 

“Wally! I am so sorry, that wasn’t me. Jason took my phone!” He hears Dicks rushed explanation and Jason, who ever that was, snickering in the background.

“O-oh,” is all the redhead can manage. 

“Yeah, sorry.” There is a brief silence. Wally wonders what he should say.

“So, uh...what’s up?”

::  
::

Wally isn't sure how he got talked into this. Probably the enormous guilt that has been eating at him since he first got back to Gotham, but here he is. In his small dorm room, alone, with Dick. 

The black haired boy is laying on his bed, legs dangling off the edge and shoes discarded on the floor. Wally himself was sitting at his desk, on the opposite side of the room nervously looking around unsure of what to do or say. Clad only in a pair of gym shorts and a muscle shirt that’s probably dirty. He tries not to think about that too much. 

“So...when are you going to stop being awkward?” The sudden question catches Wally off guard.

“Huh?” He replies dumbly.

“Wally, you are literally as far away from me as possible in this room.” He has a point.

“I..uh…” His eyes drop to the floor.

“Wally, you don't have to be awkward around me. I promise.” He gets up from the bed.

“Dick...I didn't think...I still don’t think I’m ready for this. For you. I never stopped thinking about you.” Dick makes his way slowly over to Wally. “I never stopped thinking about what I did to you and how much I hate myself for it...” He stops when Dick’s toes come into view. Looking up, he sees the frown on Dick’s face. “I’m so sorry Dick…”

“Wally, I already said I forgive you. I could never hate you...as much as I wanted to. As much as everyone around me told me I should hate you and want to hurt you just as badly as you hurt me...I didn't. I couldn't ever hate you Wally. You meant too much to me--you still do.” He wraps his arms around the still sitting Wally, pulling him into an awkward hug. The redheads face pressed into Dick’s chest while Dicks face is buried in unruly red hair. “I missed you so much Wally.”

The redhead’s arms wrap around the brunets torso, squeezing tightly. 

“I missed you too.” 

::  
::

It’s a few weeks later that Wally and Dick lay across the redhead’s bed, both pairs of eyes glued to a small screen. A laptop that Wally uses as entertainment since his small dorm room can’t really support a television. 

Both their bodies under a thick blanket to protect them from the creeping cold of the season. Occasionally a snicker or a giggle could be heard as the antics of Jason Segel or Russell Brand got particularly ridiculous. Dick couldn’t believe that the redhead had never seen Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

“It didn’t look all that interesting to me.” Wally had said.

“Dude, it’s super funny!” Dick argued. 

The brunet eventually won out and here they are. Watching a RomCom in very close proximity. Every now and again Wally sneaks a look to catch Dick’s smile. He lets a lazy smile of his own creep onto his face when something happens and Dick giggles. He’d forgotten how much he loved the other’s laugh. It hasn’t changed at all.

Dick pauses the movie and fishes his phone from his pocket, arm brushing against Wally’s side. Pulling it out, he looks at the screen. A message from Garth. It’s the third one since Dick had gotten to Wally’s. It’s also the third one he’s ignored. 

“Are you sure it’s nothing important.” Wally asks nervously.

“Nah, he’s just being clingy. Don’t worry about it Wally.”

“Okay…” He puts his phone away and unpauses the movie.

::  
::

It’s the first time they’re all together. Roy, Dick, and Wally. Along with Artemis and Roy’s roommates Miguel and Harper. Wally likes them, he really does. Miguel is nice and slightly goofy and as it turns out is going into architecture. Harper is a smart mouth who often crossed wits with Roy. They seemed to get along well. It reminds Wally of Roy and Jade...pre-dating. It’s kind of odd to watch. Artemis is having a “girl’s day” with Barbara and Harper told him that she doesn’t do “girl’s day”. Roy makes a lesbian joke and is promptly punched by Harper and Miguel. Wally had chuckled. It was nice knowing Roy’s mouth still got him in trouble. 

“Am I...George Washington?” Harper asks exasperated. There’s a headband on her brow and a card with a name on it attached to the headband. She’s been stuck on the same card for five rounds. 

“Nope!” Dick chirps.

“Am I Lincoln?”

“Nuh-uh.”

“Fucking shit!” She curses.

“You have fifteen seconds.” Roy reminds her.

“Uh...uh...Ronald Reagan!?” She cries out as the last particle of sand joins the collective in the lower chamber of the timer. There’s a chorus of “Yes!” from the other players. “Whoop!” She cheers, standing up too quickly and causing her chair to fall back. Yanking the card off her headband she slams it down into the table in front of her. “Suck it Reagan!”

“Alright, Alright. Calm down.”

“Don’t break the table chica.” 

“You’re still losing.”

“Cram it Harper!” Wally watches them all exchange words with each other, deciding to stay quiet. He still doesn't feel like he really belongs, so he watches. Dick watches Wally watching. Watches the nostalgic smile slowly form, the way his head tilts slightly when he’s enjoying himself. He honestly didn't think Wally would show, but he sure is glad the redhead did.

A harsh knock on the front door causes everyone to quiet down. Dick hops up to answer it, knowing who it is. Wally swallows hard when he hears the door creep open, letting Garth entered the warm house from the harsh cold outside. Dick wraps his arms around the taller man and Garth kisses him on the lips. It’s then that he and Garths eyes meet. They harden almost immediately into an annoyed sort of glare. Garth pulls Dick closer.

“How was work?” The smaller brunet asks after he pulls away.

“Tiring,” he lets out gruffly, letting his staring contest with Wally end; focusing now on Dick who was still in his arms, whose smile had dropped slightly. 

“Sorry you had a rough day. But you’re here now! We’re playing headbands.” Dick motions toward them. Harper, Roy, and Miguel wave. Wally sort of gulps and he hopes it wasn’t audible. 

“Actually I was hoping we could talk.” Garth pulls Dick a bit further away from them so all they can hear are murmurs and whispers. 

“Okay so!” Roy announces trying to break the silent tension. “Harpers’ at two, and everyone else is at six.” Harper gives him an annoyed look. “It’s Wally’s turn again.” They all turn to him and Wally has honestly forgotten any progress he’s made in the previous round.

“I’m a...person right?”

“No, Wally you’re a thing.” Roy grumbles. Wally hates things.

“Hey, hey! Only yes or no answers! That’s what you told me!” The only girl at them table complains. 

“She has a point amigo.” Miguel chimes in. 

“No Dick!” The sudden outburst from the other side of the room caused everyone to quiet down. “I’m tired of this!” Wally eyes Dick’s face as it morphs from tense to alarmed when he realizes everyone can now hear them. 

“Garth please…”

“No. I’m done with this. You’ve been ignoring me, my calls--messages! Because you’re hanging out with him!” Wally feels his stomach drop. “You didn’t even tell me he was here? Are you kidding me? After all he’s done to you? After all I’ve done for you? You’re still in love with him!?”

“Garth!” Dick shouts, trying and failing to make him stop. The color drains for Dick’s face and Wally’s heats up. Dick was in love with him? At some point? At any point?

“Dude, Garth. Calm down!” Roy stands up from his chair and tries to move toward the arguing couple. 

“No Roy. I know this guy is your old butt buddy from high school but--”

“I’ll leave!” Wally hears himself shout over the cacophony of the room. It immediately plunges into an even louder silence. Dick’s mouth forms a thin line, Garth’s eyebrows furrow and Roy frowns. “It’s fine.” He speaks again. “I’ll leave.” 

The redhead grabs whatever he had brought with him and heads for the door. “Wally it’s…” Roy calls after him but he himself isn’t sure what to say. His words linger in the air, helpless to stop him.

Wally moves passed Garth and Dick and out the door into the cold evening air. He runs a hand through his hair as he makes his way to the sidewalk.

“Wally wait!” Dick’s voice roots him to the ground. He quickly intakes a quick breath, hoping the cold air will calm his insides down. “Wally…” Dick walks around to the redhead’s front since he refuses to turn around. In truth Wally’s afraid that if he lifts his foot again to take another step in any direction at all, he might book it. “Wally… about what happened in there…”

“No, Dick. It’s fine.” Wally starts before Dick can find the words to finish. “He has a point...y’know? You’ve been spending like...a lot of time with me. And it’s awesome but you kinda have a boyfriend. Who hates me--for good reason! I can’t even blame him.” It’s then he notices Dick rushed out without his jacket. He looks cold there shifting his weight from one foot to the other.

Dick bites his bottom lip before he starts. “No Wally, we’ve been through this! What happened wasn’t--”

“My fault. Yeah, I know. It’s what you keep saying but Dick...I have to take some of the responsibility for it. I have to. And just because you’ve forgiven me...doesn’t mean everyone else has….or has to. Look. Today was fun. Really it was. But your boyfriend wants to be with you and he can’t stand me. So go have fun with him...We’ll talk later.“

Dick opens his mouth to respond.

“I promise.” Wally says before Dick can make him. The brunet doesn’t look happy about it but he nods solemnly and heads back inside. When he hears the click of the door behind him he lets out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding. He watches his breath billow out of his mouth like steam ‘till it dissipates before he starts on his journey back to his lonely tiny dorm room, regretting not asking Dick to join him.


End file.
